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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27707591">beauty in release</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/dytabytes/pseuds/dytabytes'>dytabytes</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fallout 4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Comfort No Hurt, Exhaustion, Gen, Hugs, Platonic Romance, Pre-Relationship, Self-Indulgent, Sole Survivor (Fallout) Needs a Hug, Touch-Starved, Unnamed Sole Survivor (Fallout)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 14:43:05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>774</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27707591</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/dytabytes/pseuds/dytabytes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>There was something about the surprised smile on Nick's face when he opened the door to see her standing there, the casual kindness in the way he ushered her in before he'd even finished saying hello. It felt like home.</i>
</p><p>===</p><p>The Sole Survivor gets a hug. It is a very good hug.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Female Sole Survivor &amp; Nick Valentine, Female Sole Survivor/Nick Valentine</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>68</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>beauty in release</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>what am I doing in this fandom? how did I get here? I remember a robot man, and then emotions, and then there were words on the page? this is a confusion.</p><p>===</p><p>That is to say: this is a rather self-indulgent fic that I wrote on a whim for no reason other than that hugs are Important, and the Sole Survivor does not get enough of them</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Well, here she was, stumbling back into Diamond City just before sunset, winding her way through the rapidly darkening streets. She didn't have a specific reason to darken this particular doorway. For once, she was mission-less with no clues to uncover or missing persons to hunt down. Somehow, her feet had brought her here anyway. </p><p>There was something about the surprised smile on Nick's face when he opened the door to see her standing there, the casual kindness in the way he ushered her in before he'd even finished saying hello. It felt like home.</p><p>“Long day, huh?” Nick's hand came to rest on her shoulder, grip light, ready to pull away at any sign that the contact might be unwanted. He was thoughtful like that. Always had been, she realized, and wasn’t that something?</p><p>“You could say that.” </p><p>The peace of Nick’s office leached away the rushing anxiety of being out in the wasteland, but the ebb of her adrenaline tide only gave bone-deep exhaustion space to rise in its wake. Her hands went slack before she’d noticed, and she felt her bag dropping to the floor before she meant to let go. That was rude, leaving her junk on the floor like that. She should have picked it up right away, apologized for making a mess. </p><p>She didn't. She was so damn tired. Even dropping into a chair seemed like it would take more effort than she could muster. It was taking her all to just <i>be</i>. </p><p>“You alright?” </p><p>The scuff of Nick’s footsteps registered through her dull haze of fatigue.</p><p>“No.” She cracked a smile like breaking bone. Time seemed to slow as she swayed, bending out of necessity rather than free will. “No, I’m not.”</p><p>The dregs of her energy rushed out of her all at once. Her knees creaked, buckled, and then she was toppling into Nick, clutching at his lapels to keep from hitting the ground. Horrified, but helpless to stop what had already happened, she wondered if this was the point where she crossed the line, where she took more than Nick was willing to give.</p><p>"Woah!"</p><p>Somehow, it wasn’t. </p><p>Her friend stumbled for a moment, caught off-guard by her sudden collapse, but then he found his feet. He guided her into his chest like this was normal, like this wasn’t the first time she had willingly touched anyone for more than a glancing moment since she’d crawled out of the Vault and into the Commonwealth.</p><p>"Hey, it's okay. I've got you."</p><p>Shit, he really was too kind for his own good.</p><p><i>I'm an asshole</i>, she thought to herself. She should have stood up. She should have brushed herself off and gotten onto her own two feet and stopped invading Nick's personal space like a creepy, needy, touch-starved baby.</p><p>But if Nick hadn't pushed her away yet... maybe she could let herself have this? Just for a moment.</p><p>A heavy, shuddering sigh escaped her mouth, the echo of a tree falling in the face of a hurricane. She shut her eyes and let Nick hold her up.</p><p>Her sense of time went a little wobbly, then. She drifted, soaking in the comfort of safety and friendship and trust. At some point, she realized that Nick had started rubbing circles between her shoulder blades. His metal palm felt different than human ones. It was harder, more angular, almost skeletal. It shouldn't have been comforting, wouldn't have been, except that he touched her so gently. It felt so warm somehow, that touch through her shirt, even though she knew that Nick's uninsulated metal hand was barely room temperature on a good day.</p><p>God, maybe she really was losing it.</p><p>“Sorry.” She mumbled into the fabric of Nick's coat, breathing in the familiar ghost of cigarettes and gunpowder as she pressed her forehead into his shoulder. She was a wreck, and she knew it. Couldn't even manage a proper apology because while there were so many things that she ought to apologize for, she didn't regret any of the liberties she'd taken; especially not this one.</p><p>When she spoke, Nick's hand stilled as if he'd suddenly realized what they were doing. Just as she braced herself for him to pull back, to put distance between them again, he gave her a squeeze. </p><p>“Don’t be.”</p><p>Instead of letting go, Nick shifted to rest his chin on her head, managing to somehow bring her wonderfully closer. </p><p>They stayed like that until long after her shivering stopped; until the sun had set and the only light in the room was the glow of Nick's eyes and the flicker of the neon lights outside.</p>
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